First Race

It’s been a while. I’ve not abandoned you. I’ve got a lot to recap

Wednesday is yoga day and aerial yoga day.  And today, it was race pick up day too. Performance Running is a great company with a few stores in my area. Everyone there seems to be very knowledgable both in experience and in the products. They have never made me feel weird because I’m a beginner. I’ve found the running community to be very welcoming overall, and the employees of this store are no exception. Pick up was easy. Got checked in with my bib, then off to get my fleece, and done. Of course, I had to do a little perusing. After talking to someone about the merits of salting watermelon, I got some Gu for my long runs, including the salted watermelon flavor.

In class, we focused on gratitude. It was very restorative with only a few “power” moves to get the blood moving. Of course, I snuck in some runner’s yoga too. After all, I had my first race on Thursday. I had a wonderful surprise. One of my first yoga “students” came to class. I was bookended by my first and most recent students. I felt extremely blessed and honored that these people choose me to help them with their yoga practices. Both are extremely kind and wonderful people. I really don’t like to call them students. I would like to think of myself as more of a guide or lead for them to develop their yoga. It was a great way to start Thanksgiving weekend.

Thursday was THE DAY! I’ve been training to increase my distances but this was my first race. I started running in spring and I was about to run 5 miles with a large group of people. Wednesday night I put lavender in our humidifier and it worked like a dream. I slept like a rock till the dog woke me up for the morning pee. After our little adventure outside, I went back to bed, setting the alarm, drifting back off to sleep. And suddenly bolt awake! It was too light out and I felt too rested. My alarm didn’t go off! I was running ten minutes behind. While shoveling a light greek yogurt in my mouth, it occurred to me that the alarm was set for Saturday, not Thursday. I took a shower to wash all the anxiety away, well, most of it. After getting dressed and not pestering my boyfriend too much with “let’s go,” we were on our way thru the city to the Lake. Lake Michigan is a fickle neighbor. You never know how windy it was going to be. Or if a sudden rain storm or snow will begin.

Thankfully, we got their 45 minutes early. I tried to convince my boyfriend we needed an hour but compromised for 45. I like to be early, get the lay of the land, and get comfortable with my surroundings. To be honest, 45 min was just about right since I had already grabbed my bib. There were lots of people. Some serious looking runners to a teen dressed up in a bacon costume. We walked thru the avenue of PortaPotties to the starting line. I did some dynamic stretching while observing everyone around me. Boyfriend and I checked out the runners in matching costumes and tried to avoid the runners with see thru running tights. I do not need to know you are wearing a thong.

Shirt I wore

It was time to get in the corral.  A man over the loud speaker insisted that walkers start in back, competitors in front. I tried to position myself in the middle. There was no “GO!” or starting pistol, just a throng of people moving forward. Some people were jogging, others walking and the speedy people were trying to make it to the front. I had started my Runkeeper and my Garmin but the race started a few minutes late, so their evaluation of me was a little off. I tried to keep to my pace but everyone was passing me. Bacon passed me. Turkey Tutu Twins passed me. Inflatable Turkey passed me. And I abandoned my pace. All these people couldn’t be passing me and me be going at my planned pace of 11:00. I had to be counting wrong. I found out later looking at my stats it was just everyone rushing. I knew that there were going to be people passing me but I didn’t expect that much. Eventually, I just settled in and did my best to keep jogging. I didn’t want to walk. I can jog 9.5 miles, so I can certainly do 5 miles. As I settled in, I found I had misjudged the race course and there was a very large hill. That hill took people out. But I kept going. I heard retching behind me and other racers on the side, hands to knees. I passed Bacon and the Turkey Tutu Twins. I passed very athletic looking people. I was in my head and my head was in my ear telling me I was in over my head. But I reminded myself I did this twice a week. I had trained for this and longer. I felt confidence and my legs grew more steady. Some people were still passing me. There was a 5k option and it was hard not to turn in. I was tired from my fast start. The wind was stealing my breath. I reminded myself I can and will do this. And no walking. I will finish. I think that’s when my training set in. I saw more and more people struggling on the side of the trail. There was my boyfriend driving by waving, cheering me on. I started counting again. Piano lessons and a metronome came to mind counting out meters. One guy would speed pass me and then be winded at the side. I ran behind a girl high stepping for a while. I heard a group of guys ask when the fun starts and I yelled behind me “With the cinnamon rolls!” And I made the turn and started my last leg. I was feeling my legs, there was no disconnection. I felt each footfall. My stomach started to flip flop. Apparently, my yogurt was not enough. I hadn’t stopped for the water, maybe I should have. The last leg felt long. Very long. The sprinkles had turned into a full on rain and my shirt was plastered to me.

Picture boyfriend took.

And then I saw the PortaPotties. I felt hope re-engergize me. I found that last push. I crossed that line feeling strong and nearly in tears. In spring, this never would have been possible. I couldn’t run a mile in spring. And I just completed my 8k race. The joy and pride was overwhelming. Not only that, there was a delicious cinnamon roll in my near future. My end stats were 54:39, which I think translates into 10:55/mile. I was 463 out of about 600 but there were some that didn’t make it in time before the course closed. Boyfriend insists I was in the middle and I should be kinder in my head to myself. He is probably right. :)

Pre-Race

Post race

My friends and family have two main responses. Half think I’m crazy. Heck, I would probably think the same thing of someone last year. The other half just tell me how proud and amazed they are. And the truth is that I think most have a mixture of the two. All I know is I am thankful that I did this and then got to enjoy three Thanksgivings with loved ones.

Happy Thanksgiving!

More to come. I have Saturday and Monday to recap. And will have a Tuesday too. Stay tuned tomorrow.

Ice Ice Baby

Thursday is the big day. Thursday is my racing debut.

And I'm anxious. Very anxious. My brain is divided into two parts. There is the part that is excited and knows that I'm more than capable of completing this course in time, and without walking. It knows that I can do this with hills at an 11:00 pace. I do this distance twice a week. The other part is worrying. What if I forget to wear my running shoes? What if the wind from Lake Michigan undermines my clothing choices? What if I come in last? What if I have to poop?

So I put my trust in my training, in my Higher Power, and knowing someone has to come in last, but at least that someone finished.

All of this is going thru my head as I do a short run this morning. Which is sort of funny because I can now say 2.6 miles is a short run. Last January, that would have seemed daunting. I have some serious mileage ahead of me and my long runs don't even scare me any more. If I don't have early responsibilities, I should be running 10.5 miles and I'm looking forward to it.

The run itself was relatively uneventful. I went without music as headphones are discouraged at this Turkey Trot. I just needed to get used to listening to all the stuff racing thru my mind. I am very grateful I wasn't trying to do any sort of speed work. 1) The dog was a serial pee-er again. 2) Ice.
Ice is the runner's nemesis. While most of the sidewalks were clear, there was sneaky patches of ice. There was the skip of my heart when I felt the slippery footing underneath my Xodus GTX. Sometimes, whole sections were blatant ice rinks that required careful shuffling across. My time was slow, but it should be. The point of the run was to keep my legs loose for the race and not to try for a personal record.

I did find one thing out. Runkeeper is silent when I don't have my headphones plugged into it. I'll carry it with me so I can see my splits on Thursday. I am also considering running in this shirt. It might be funny, or might be out of place. I can't decide.

Tomorrow is yoga in the morning, pick up race packet after work, and aerial yoga in the evening. Maybe I should make a list of questions in hopes someone at the store can answer them and pick up some racing fuel for my long run. In yoga, I'll be focusing on my quads, hamstrings, achilles and hip flexors. I'll also be focusing on shushing my mind.

Fly, Run, Fly

By the time I left work, everyone was all abuzz about the impending snow. Here, in Wisconsin, the first snowfall is a big deal. It separates the Wisconsinites from those who just live here.

But first came the aerial yoga. There are parts of aerial yoga that I adore and parts that I am not a fan of in the least. Discovering new flows, love. Leg series, no love. Hanging upside down, love. Full arm planks, no love. And we did both of those in class in warm up. The rest of the class I enjoyed because it was tailored to me. At the beginning of many yoga classes, aerial or not, the instructor will as if any one has anything they want to work on, or anything that hurts. This is your chance to make the class a better fit for you. If you have injured something, the instructor may avoid the one series and substitute another or be sure to provide you with modifications so you can get the most of the class. Or if you have something you want to work out, or a pose that you love, the instructor can do his or her best to work it in to the class. No one said anything so I asked for "yoga for runners" and for the next hour or so we released our lower backs, stretched our quads and loosened our hip flexors.

And then the snow started. 

And then comes the another situation where I get crazy looks. I ran in it. Dog woke me up at 4:30 and off we went. It didn't feel particularily cold. I was extremely aware of my footing. I've seen the meme where the lady talks about the joy of running in the snow, only to fall dramatically as she ran from the camera. see here. 

I never really settled into this run. I did essentially an out and back. Normally, I do big loops so that I can always diagonal my way home if I want to call it quits. Maybe I didn't want to give myself that option. The dog and I got a few honks and waves as we ran by cops and snow plows. The snow didn't really start to stick to the sidewalk until mile 5. While I never felt comfortable in this run, I did feel very serene. I was aware of the sound of the dog's tags jingling, the sound of my feet on the snow covered ground, the puff of my breath, the snow resting on my eyelashes. Mostly, I was aware of the white stretch of untouched snow in front of me. My mind was quiet. My legs moved under their own accord because if I thought about them, I was afraid I would realize how tired I was. Dog started giving me dirty looks about 7 miles in. She was coated in snow and had little icicle whiskers. At mile 8, that's when the real bargaining started. I should just take the short route, 8 miles is enough. I shouldn't be running in this weather. But I kept going and knowing I was so close to being done found a little spring in my step for the last mile and a half. Normally, in snow, I've heard I should add 30 seconds on to my pace. Considering I beat my last pace by 10 seconds, I was more than happy to add another -30 seconds. It felt so very invigorating to do nearly ten miles in snow. It felt like a moving meditation. You cannot see it here but there were snowflakes on my eyelashes.

If you ever have any question on what to wear for a run, Runners World has a great resource to help you decide. 

On Sunday, I had a great oppurtunity with the yoga studio I work at. We were invited to be part of the Holiday Parade. If I can run 9.5 miles in snow at the butt crack of dawn, a parade should be a cake walk, right? One of our other instructors knows her way around the craft table and made us all costumes to fit the theme of the Isle of Misfit Toys. I was the dolly. I feel it necessary to add here that the temperatures were hovering around 20F and only dropping. I put on a couple of layers, put on make up and made the drive over to the city of Waukesha. 

The costume added another layer. Hot hands were passed around. Hot chocolate was downed. We were nearly late for judging due to a cop giving us not quite accurate directions. Riding on a trailer at 25 mph is an exillerating and life acknowledging moment. And cold. Very cold. We had a short rig and lots of decorations. Sadly, I don't have a good picture of the float as I was in it most of the time. But the Chamber of Commerce said we were definitely one of the top floats. Obviously, we had a Bumble and everything!

We all had fun. Our candy supply was exhausted and at some point you just accept the freezing temperatures and the inability to feel your toes. 

No run this morning, I'll run in snow, but this hit or miss ice seems too dangerous to do even with a flashlight. Besides, I have to take it easy. Race day Thursday!

Getting Wrapped Up and Cold Weather Running

I love Wednesday nights. And what a lovely night it was. The light was fantastic. The photographer in me wanted to chase the sunset.

The light alone on the bare branches was a brilliant vermillion. 

I teach low aerial in the evening. Low aerial has a special place in my heart. I enjoy regular aerial yoga but low keeps me grounded and centered. Class varies between relaxed asanas so the class feels more like Yin yoga and a restorative but rigorous class. I like to choose something to focus on. Sometimes the floor is lava and sometimes we open our hearts up to the universe. Last night was about wraps and increasing blood flow. Think of it like a water hose where you build up a pressure and then release it letting a rush of water out. Arm wraps, leg wraps, we did as many as we could fit into 60 minutes. The students are wonderful and adventurous to where I can say "I've never done this, but let's try this." It was a regular and I, which led to a very organic class. It was also joined by my dog who made sure we were showered with kisses. We ended with a fully wrapped reclining hero and baby seal. Classes always make me feel rejuvenated. Dancer is a nice wrap and has become a regular asana in my class.

When I came home, my fiance had decorated the house for the holidays. I definitely feel the season in the house. Nevermind the bucket and the upside down table. We have a stubborn rug that will not straighten out.

We live in a lovely neighborhood; very residential with older and, sometimes, rather posh homes. Most of the streets are well lit and in good condition. The sidewalks can be difficult to run on in the early mornings. There are many old trees with roots trying to escape their concrete tombs. 

I was smart this morning, unlike Tuesday, and checked the weather. I ran in my windproof jacket and made sure my ears were covered. The temperatures were still quite mild but the wind was rather fierce. Technology issues delayed the start of my run but it got sorted out. The first mile is always rough. My mind keeps asking why we are up so early. My previous dog would have refused to get up at this ungodly hour. 

After that first mile though, it was all smooth going. My pace was quick and steady. Stoplights were all in my favor. My breath came easily until the last 1/2 mile but I still found a burst of energy to finish the run. Obligatory post-run selfie

Dog was a serial pee-er this morning. I was off my fastest time by 26 seconds. I am glaring in her general direction. She doesn't care. She is very cat-like in that way. Yes, she is laying on the back of the couch

I've had a few people say that they run and then look horrified when I tell them when and where I run. Yes, I run at 4am in the morning. Well, that's when I wake up. It takes another 10 minutes for me to get out the door. Yes, I run outside. With the right gear, outside is feasible for most of the year in this part of Wisconsin. If I lived up north, I might sing a different tune. It is peaceful then. There are just a few people out; bikers, runners and people catching the bus. The dog has issues on leash so the fewer distractions the less crazy dog barking at the end of her leash. She is an alpha dog even though she knows I am the alpha female and pack leader. There is a silence and peace that I do not get with later runs. And of course the sunrises are awfully nice when I'm out late enough in the morning to catch them. This is from a run in Wisconsin Rapids. While there are times I don't want to get out of bed, I wouldn't want to miss this for all the world.

Taking To the Air and Taking To the Ground

Last night, I had a chance to take two classes with other teachers at the studio's second and primary location.

The first class was a fun aerial yoga class with the great Kate. She brings her dance background into class and creates such an engaging and challenging class. Part of the fun is the invention and connection of asanas. There is a lot of "ok, so when I get here....what can I do next?" The whole class is so organic. Everyone gets a moment to shine and everyone gets to feel special.

The second class was aerial conditioning. It was my first time attending and it really revealed all my weaknesses. My shoulders are weak. My planks need improvement. I felt the panic of not being awesome immediately. I grunted and panted with this effort and flushed while watching the other students nail each progression. I had to start to do damage control in my head. The truth was I struggled this hard when I first started aerial yoga. None of it was easy. All of it was hard fought. This silly panic was just my fear of being left behind. And our studio leaves no one behind. I just have a lot of work ahead of me to be awesome in this adventure. It reminds me to be kind and patient with all newcomers in my classes.

This morning was perfect for a run. It was mid-40's and drizzling and 4:20am.  I tied on my Saucony, strapped on my Garmin HRM under my yoga shirt. Fleece leggings kept my legs warm to prevent cramping, reflective jacket and elastic reflective bands. Music on, Runkeeper on, Garmin on. Dog ready to go. First mile, my brain was up to it's usual doubt. It tells me that I should stop, that I'm not a runner, I can't do this. The second mile was not much better and I was getting warm, too warm. Third mile, I've got my disconnection. My legs are just eating up the sidewalk, but it's automatic, like a heartbeat. Off comes the jacket, need to cool down. The heat can be smothering. If I get too warm, my breath comes harder and my heart needs to put in extra work. Fourth mile, I start to feel a little fatigue and the brain takes this time to tell me I'm done. Go home. You have no more left in you. My brain is a liar. Last mile, I'm panting. I'm sure I'm beet red in the face. And it's over. 4.9 miles done and logged. It was another struggle of a run since I was sick for two weeks, but I am recovering. Running hair, don't care.

Introductions Are In Order

Twas a dark and stormy night....

Not really but it seemed like a good way to start my blog as it has served so many writers before me.

When I turned 30, I realized I didn't really know who I was. Somewhere along the way to adulthood, I lost myself. Friends helped me and supported me thru this process of feeling my emotions, not being a people pleaser, realizing I can't fix everything, and discovering myself. In Runaway Bride, Julia Roberts' character didn't know how she liked her eggs. I was the same way.

So this is what I've found:

I live with depression and anxiety. They live in my head and try to get me to be the old me. I won't say that I suffer with them. It gives them too much power, but the truth is that they are there. I don't talk about them much as I don't want to give them too much power over my life. One of the biggest and most important things I learned is that feelings are not facts. The other thing is that it is ok for me to have emotions, feel them and let them go.

I used to spin poi, sometimes I spun fire poi. I wasn't sure what to do with them after awhile and set them aside, but I told a friend at work about them. One day, she was on Living Social and found a special for aerial yoga. She told me I should try it. I was suspicious about this whole concept. It seemed a little crazy. And, of course, I fell in love with it and now teach it part-time. Aerial yoga uses a hammock of 40 tricot denier to assist in regular yoga poses. It acts like a partner and a bolster. It uses gravity to deepen some asanas and, at the same time, takes the pressure of gravity off of other asanas. Regular yoga was difficult for me due to a form of myalgia I live with, but aerial yoga was a blessing.

Here is an album of aerial yoga

And here is me in one of my favorite poses.

As I mentioned, I do have myalgia which takes many forms including burning skin and joint pain. Because of this, I moved less. And with the depression, I ate more food. My weight skyrocketed. I decided I needed to do something about it and I started walking. The dog and I would go for hour long walks. It didn't work. I was still gaining weight and I didn't know why. While reading an article on Buzzfeed, I came across MyFitnessPal. The website helps you reach your weight goals with calorie counting and exercise tracking. It also has an active forum that has a wealth of information. You can find me here. And I started to lose weight very slowly. Very slowly. Too slowly. So slow, I started to feel defeated. I asked myself what I could do to increase my exercise level. 

The answer was running. I rejected the idea. I was not a runner. I was not built for running. I have short stubby legs. Turtles passed me when I walked. But the calorie burn! I love food but food loves my waist line. So I tried it. It was not love at first jog. I despised it. I could barely jog a mile. Then, someone on the MFP forums suggested Couch to 5k by Zen Labs. You run in intervals, eventually running for a full 30 minutes. And I did it. And I enjoyed it. So I moved on to Bridge to 10k and I completed that too. I am now training for half marathon distances. I ran 9.56 miles without stopping on Saturday.

I am on Runkeeper. 

I know that this has all been a little dry but now you know a little bit about me. 

So a few quick things.

I have a fiance. I love him dearly and we both have grown so much together. I wouldn't be the me I am now if it hadn't been for him.

I have a corn snake. 

I have a livebearer freshwater tank, a cichlid tank with a killifish, a saltwater tank, and a betta in an awesome fish bowl with a koi carved bottom.

I have a rough coated/border collie mix. I love all things with fur but I love dogs the most

I also love the Bristol Renaissance Fair

Lastly, I enjoy shooting photography. I do it for fun. My Flickr